There is a lot going on just now with my charity, The Scottish Centre for Personal Safety.

As you no doubt know, our base is the Barony St John Centre on Princes Street in Ardrossan and we are currently building a cafe extension on to this building.

This has created a number of problems of its own, not least finding the funds to bring this project to fruition.

Additionally, I am developing a personal safety course for people with learning disabilities, which is taking up a lot of my time, and has garnered a few defeatist comments from unsupporting individuals.

So recently, it often feels like I am surrounded by naysayers and negative people. You know the type – those that always pooh-pooh your ideas, tell you “it can’t be done”, speak ill of you behind your back, and secretly wish you and your plans fail. The world is full of negative, hateful people.

But recently, I read about the 'Let Them' theory by US podcaster Mel Robbins. Are you familiar with it?  

It is a way of changing your mindset, freeing yourself of the negativity that surrounds you and allows you to focus on the positives. It goes something like this;

Let them be upset.

Let them judge you.

Let them misunderstand you.

Let them gossip about you.

Let them ignore you.

Let them be "right."

Let them doubt you.

Let them not like you.

Let them not speak to you.

Let them run your name in the ground.

Let them make you out to be the villain.
 

Whatever it is that people want to say about you, let them! Simply turn a deaf ear and ‘let them’! Because the hard truth is, these people simply don’t care about you, your wellbeing, your hopes, your dreams or your work – so ‘let them’ go.

There will be people that would rather lose you than be honest about what they've done to you or said about you – so ‘let them’ go.

The lack of respect they showed towards you was the closure. The lack of apology was the closure. The lack of care was the closure. The lack of accountability was the closure. The lack of honesty was the closure. Let them go.

Make the decision to no longer sit at tables where you might be the topic when you get up. Let them go.

You can still be kind but do it from the distance these people created in their words and actions. Access to you is a privilege they have proven they can’t be trusted with. Let them go.

Trust in yourself. Trust what you are doing is right. Trust that your dreams will become fulfilled. As long as you are doing the right thing, following your plan, and being true to yourself, you will prevail – despite the naysayers.

Unfortunately, it is usually hurt people that hurt people. But we can rise above them ourselves - because healed people do, in fact, heal people.

So if you have negative people or naysayers in your life, don’t ‘let them’ steal your joy. Don’t ‘let them’ steal your light. Don’t ‘let them’ steal your peace. Don’t ‘let them’ destroy your dreams, hopes and ambitions. You are in control of that. So focus on what you can control and ignore what you can’t. Just ‘let them’ go.

I hope this helps you the way it helped me. Until next time, stay safe